I Wore a Purple Wig to Whole Foods

I wore a purple wig to Whole Foods. Call it my Britney Spears à la 2007 moment, I frantically must have asked Alex at least twice a minute if it was okay and if I was an idiot. 

Let’s circle back. You’ll notice that this is the (quiet) re-launch of the Salubrious newsletter. In early 2022 I had only written a few newsletters but I was drowning. We had just moved back to Portland after moving to NC to be closer to family in the wake of Covid, I was dealing with coming off a year of multiple miscarriages, two tumor diagnoses which were thankfully benign but possibly causing hormonal issues, and I had already gone vegan but still owned a non-vegan food publication that I wanted nothing to do with but it was the only thing paying the bills. 

I was grasping at anything I thought would ground me and a newsletter seemed like a good fit. However tired I was, it didn't stop me from wanting to connect with like-minded people but I didn’t have the capacity to go find them. 

After wrapping up the newsletter I’d spend the next year and a half, really up until September 2023, floundering. I stopped creating recipes for clients, I prepared the keto business for sale, and I thought nothing about food. It was a chore to even eat 2 meals a day.

I realize now that I needed that break, and depression to be honest, to come back to myself and to know what creative path I wanted and needed to walk down. Not based on what I thought other people would want to see or what I thought would be profitable but what truly felt like me. To be honest I’m still floundering but at least the floundering feels like I’m headed in the right direction.

After selling the keto business this past March, I rented a small art studio for the summer and started to come home to myself. I had a few pieces accepted into juried shows and slowly but steadily I found my creative spark returning. I found styles that felt true to me - abstract, street, futuristic, neon, MCM with a touch of postmodernism. Clearly not defined by one thing, why was I always trying to put myself in a box?

Being in a place now where my only goal is to create true to self feels magical, freeing, and comforting. I’ve had a note on my phone for months of essay ideas around art and culture as well as a never-ending list of recipe ideas that keep popping out of my brain at lightning speed. It feels good to get those creative neurons firing again after flatlining for so long, though these days I don’t have a platform to share them on. So, the rebirth of Salubrious made sense and I’m very thrilled to be back sharing food and musings with you and myself, really. 

Yes, I do yearn for connection, who doesn’t? But I’m also okay with this being a public diary of sorts. These are words I need to write, and food I need to create. It’s like an incessant itch under the surface. I’m grateful for whoever wants to come along. 

One of these moments of self-clarity came on Halloween this year. I’ve never been one to dress up but I was invited to a Halloween party and swung by a costume shop for something “futuristic”. I found a platinum dress and paired it with sparkly tights, platinum stiletto boots, colorful makeup, pink aviators, and a purple wig. Plus a few glow light bracelets for good measure, obviously. 

When I put on the purple wig, I loved it. I felt like myself. You know how a good haircut can give you an injection of confidence? That was this wig for me, sans any societal reservations I had about donning a colorful wig. I loved the bangs, I loved the multi-colored pink/purple ombré, and I loved the styling of it without having to do a damn thing to it. 

The wig garnered plenty of compliments at the party and I felt just a bit more comfortable wearing it. A few weeks later, I was having a horrific hair day and thought “why the hell not” and threw it on for the day. 

So, that’s how I found myself walking into Whole Foods in a purple wig. 

Frankly, I’m pretty damn proud of myself for just doing it. Like Britney, I too was pushing back but at myself for not embracing myself. It was an immersive lesson in being okay with trying something that others may think is silly or “cringe.”

Wouldn’t we all be a bit happier if we shunned the opinions of others and let ourselves be creative in whatever way calls to us? 

By surrendering to that creative pull we’re showing ourselves that we will show up for us, that we find our interests important and worthy of exploration. It all comes down to reparenting ourselves.